Individuals
by BarracudaHeart
Summary: Lars shows up to work drunk, and admits his mistakes to Sadie, who admits her own. Follows the events of the episode 'Island Adventure' Warnings- Mentions of depression, alcohol and brief language.


Even with her muscles screaming and bones aching, Sadie was determined to go to work that day. She'd been on bed rest for the last three days, telling her roommate that she slipped on a steep hill while on a hiking trip, and fell hard. Because she knew that nobody was ever going to believe that she'd been lost on a magical desert island, and ended up fighting an invisible monster at least five times her size, all by herself? Silly shorty Sadie? No way.

Slowly getting off the bus, stiffly hobbling to the Big Doughnut, she huffed as she saw the shop's lights were not on, the interior dark and silent, aside from the lights of the cold product freezers, and the 'We're Closed, _Do nut Panic_!' sign (a horrible pun the owner came up with) was still in the window.

_Lars is supposed to be in charge of opening the place this week! I told him I wasn't going to be able to move!_, Sadie grumbled in her head, hand wandering in her coat pocket for the spare key she had to the place, unlocking the door, and turning on all the lights. She had to individually turn on the old fashioned chain switch ceiling fans for the summer rush, using a stepladder to do so, not tall enough to reach them. Once the store was set, she began to place all the doughnuts in their proper cases, setting them for display in the window and the back racks. Even with her aching body, she was able to get it efficiently done. She even checked the break room to make sure everything in there was working, almost expecting Lars to be in there, slacking, but there was no sign of him.

Part of her wondered if he'd been late or even absent from work for the last three days. He could easily get fired if the owner found out the shop wasn't running like it was supposed to. She _herself_ could get fired if the boss knew Sadie had put Lars in charge of opening the shop with the knowledge he was a slacker.

It wasn't really like she had a choice. After the 'vacation' they were on, Lars and Steven had followed Sadie home, Steven cheerfully expressing that they should make sure she was alright, and didn't collapse at the bus stops. They even went on the bus with her, Sadie opting to sit by Steven, leaving Lars to sit behind them and sulk. When she got home, Lars was about to say something, but she simply shoved the store key into his hand, tiredly grouching that he was in charge of opening the shop tomorrow, closing the door before the other could even answer. She was tired, and too emotionally drained to even care. She'd been doing her best to help Lars, and if all he could do was push her away, then so be it, he could figure his problems out himself. Besides, she was supposed to start college that fall, he was a year younger, why did it even matter?

In the basic scheme of things, she was supposed to be the strong independent adult, he was a stupid kid. Sure, they had gone to the same school, were in the same clubs, and even ate lunch at the same table, in spite of her supposed to be hanging out with kids in her own class, but now that she was graduated, and off to college, why did she still hang with Lars, with how much of a flake he was? Maybe because he had no other friends until she came along? Maybe because he was the only real friend she ever had?

She was shook out of her thoughts when Steven came in. Even on her gloomiest days, the kid always seemed to make them a little better. He grinned, "Sadie! You're back!"

"Hi Steven," she smiled tiredly, pulling up a chair to the register for her sore back.

"Are you feeling better?", he smiled, heading up to the counter, flopping his arms over it, resting his head on it.

"A little, yeah," she nodded, "Still sore, but I can at least move enough to press register buttons," she joked.

The boy laughed, then perked up, "Oh! By the way! I made you a get well card!", he announced, gleefully pulling out a folded piece of cardstock.

"Aw Steven, you really didn't ha-", she stopped to hold back a laugh, seeing the drawing on the card. It was a drawing of her, beating the crap out of a wobbly crayon monster, her face in attack mode, a spear in hand. In big bold letters like a comic book title read 'SADIE THE MONSTER SLAYER', along with a few drawn in sound effects. It was really amusing, making the doughnut clerk laugh. She saw in the bottom was written, "Get Well Soon Sadie! 3 Steven" along with the signatures of Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl (who wrote in parentheses, "I don't know you...?"), and even Lars signature too. "Lars signed this? Was he here earlier?"

"Yeah, yesterday," Steven nodded, "He seemed sad though. He didn't even get mad when I tried to fix the melted faces on the Lion Lickers!"

"I thought we told you not to do that because then you have to pay for all the Lickers you opened!", she sighed.

"But their faces always look so saaaad!", he pouted, then slapped a couple dollar bills on the counter, "Gimme the usual, please. Oh! And a chocolate coconut for Amethyst! That's why I came by!"

"Sure," she nodded, picking the doughnuts out, "So...why was Lars looking sad?"

"I dunno, maybe he missed you," Steven shrugged, helping himself to the free samples on the tray by the register, "I guess he couldn't wait for his shift to end to see you."

Sadie paused, "He never visited me, Steven."

Steven stopped mid bite of a sample, "Whaaat, he didn't visit his hero girlfriend?"

"I'm not his girlfriend," she answered tensely, almost snapping at the boy, but then sighed, soothing her tone, "Well, we're not...together. I don't know where we are at this point."

"...Oh," Steven nodded, sensing the mood, and continued to chew the doughnut, taking the bag he purchased, then smiled, "When we got you home, we had to take the bus back, and we sat on the bus together. We got shave ice too! Well, _I_ got shave ice, and Lars paid for it. Then he walked home with me," he smiled, "It was fun."

"Didn't you get in trouble with your gem...parent...sister...people?", Sadie asked, unsure what to call them.

"Nah. They weren't too worried. They think fifty years is a short time," he laughed.

"Well, ok...", she shrugged, glad the kid wasn't grounded.

"I wonder if Lars' family missed him," Steven thought aloud.

"They probably did," Sadie mumbled, "His mom is really nice, she made cookies whenever I was over to help him study."

"What kind of cookies?", Steven asked, as if it were the most important question in the world.

"I don't even remember," she laughed, sorely resting in the chair, "That was like, sophomore year of high school."

"Again with the school stuff!", Steven sounded exasperated, beginning to ask if there was a 'low school' before high school, and other questions of the like. Soon, he ended up leaving, and Sadie found herself alone again, and looked at the clock, groaning as she saw it was an hour into the shift, and Lars still wasn't there. Maybe he'd already been fired, and the boss was finding a replacement for him.

Sadie was grateful the work day was slow, most people wanting cold drinks instead of doughnuts, especially in the warm beach weather. Two hours in, she realized Lars still hadn't shown up, which would be a complete pain during the afternoon rush, especially if it got bad. She needed aspirin and a heating pad, and hot sugar water or something soothing.

Around 11:30, three and a half hours into the shift, the shop was completely empty, which prompted Sadie to rest her head on the table, groaning from her sore neck. Several minutes after, she gave a soft groan, only to hear another as if in reply, and looked up, seeing Lars finally showing up, uniform on crooked, socks mismatched, and his hair a mess. He looked a mess himself, bags under his eyes, "...Sadie? Y-You're back? I thought y-"

"You're late," she spoke blankly, looking unimpressed, "The rush is going to start soon."

"Oh...yeah. Dunno what time I even got outta bed," he mumbled, walking over, looking ready to fall. He had to grip onto the counter to stay steady, "I got sucha headache..."

"You think _you_ have it bad?", she asked, still sounding annoyed.

He only responded with a groan, knees buckling behind the register. Sadie immediately perked up, "Are you ok? Do you need a chair?"

"I'm fine," he groaned, trying to stand, "Just woozy...Hey'dya...ya do somethin' with your hair? It looks niiiice."

She frowned, "Lars, you're being weird."

"Sorry," he mumbled, deflating, "I'm...I'm a loser," he seemed to admit. Before his companion could even reply, he began to blubber, 'I suck! I can't do anything right!"

"Lars, I-," Sadie began with a sigh, then smelled something, immediately recognizing it, "Lars, are you...are you _drunk?_"

"Me? Nah. Nah. Never. ", he mumbled, slouching in place, ready to fall. Sadie readied herself to catch him, wincing in pain as she steadied him, arms still sore.

When he fell again, she caught him with quick reflex, "Lars-!", she winced in pain, "Go lie down in the back, the customers can't see you drunk!"

"But you're gonna be alone-"

"Go to the back. Now." She ordered, no-nonsense mode in full action. Once she made sure he was out of sight of the customers, she readied for the impending summer afternoon rush.

It hit full force, and much to Sadie's dismay, everyone seemed so eager to get their purchases and go, so she had to be quick on the draw. Not to mention, some of the customers could be rude. Lars could usually handle these customers better than she could, he didn't stick to apologizing too much, or fumbling or getting flustered with their brashness. Too bad he had that particular attitude for everything else.

Sadie was just so frustrated with him, because every time it seemed he could be better, he drew back into that shell of prickliness and bitterness towards people, and stayed in there as if his life depended on it. She just wanted him to stop trying to pushing her away every time she tried to get closer.

Once the rush was over, Sadie looked in the break room to see Lars wilted pathetically on the napkins she slept on during slow days. Knowing for sure he wasn't faking now, she went back to the register, waiting until the shift was over before going to the break room, passing the imprint from The Accident (they never forgot Kyle. Never would), and approached Lars, who looked akin to a discarded crash test dummy, the lanky teen sprawled over the napkins, staring ahead blankly, trying to fight a headache.

Grabbing her purse, Sadie found the bottle of aspirin she always carried, shaking out two for Lars, and two for her sore body. She nudged him, "Take these for your headache," she offered blankly.

Lars shifted his gaze to her hand, and stretched an arm out with a groan, slurring, "Thankyou..."

Once he'd taken them, she decided to ask with an unamused tone, "How and why are you drunk?"

"Ughh...", he groaned, curling up, "Uhhh...no clue..."

"Lars.", she spoke bluntly.

"Broke into dad's cabinet," he groaned, admitting it quickly.

"...OK.", she frowned, crossing her arms, "Why?"

"Why?"

"Why are you drunk?"

Lars just looked at her, and curled up with a groan, hiding his face in his arm.

"Why?", she repeated, same blank, but strict tone there.

"...because...I ruin everything," he mumbled, "Can't do anything right."

"And getting drunk is going to make you do it right?", she frowned.

"No...it makes me forget," he mumbled, "At least a little while," he whined, face still covered.

Sadie sighed, "Lars, that's... That's not good for you. Promise me you won't do that again...please?"

"Why should I promise you anything y-", he began defensively, then shrunk back down, like a scared cat.

The other just looked at him with pity, and a world-weary gaze, "Lars. I...I can't wait for you to try and do better. I've tried to help you, because you won't help yourself."

"Liar, y' trapped me on an island so you could get some!" he snapped, then shrunk back again, realizing what he said.

Sadie stared at him indignantly, "I did it becase I thought it would make you happy! I hadn't seen you happy in a long time! You used to be such a good kid!"

"Don't you call me a kid! I'm not a kid!", he lashed back, sitting up, head pounding, "You just think that with you being in college you can treat me like I don't know nothing!"

"Lars, we've been friends for years, I've missed who you used to be!", she frowned, eyes pleading.

"I was a loser!", he blubbered, "I still am! You hate me now!"

"No I don't!", she insisted.

"Yes you do!", he whined, looking ready to cry, "You don't wanna even talk to me anymore!", he began to babble nonsense, and soon Sadie realized the alcohol was talking, as he even blubbered, "Now we're gonna get divorced."

If things weren't so heated, Sadie would have laughed, but instead, she looked at her lap, sitting on the napkins now, "You're...you're right. I shouldn't have hidden the warp pad. I was just...trying to help," she mumbled, "...I...know you're depressed."

She knew Lars had depression, badly, she'd known for a long time. He'd been so good at hiding it from everyone else during school and work, but there was some nights where he would text Sadie, telling her he just needed to talk, or even ask if she could come over to do homework, when really, they would just munch on snacks and talk over video games. She always thought that made him feel better. They'd not done that in a long time. She'd thought maybe with a vacation, they could hang out like they used to, and just relax.

"I just wanted us to hang out again like we used to. I wanted to make you happy again. I know why you act like you do, and I just kind of miss the old you...I never thought you were a loser," she mumbled, petting his hand.

Lars looked at her with wet eyes, blubbering, "Sadie...nobody ever listens to me. Nobody ever listens to me..."

"...I do, Lars. I always have," she mumbled softly, looking at her hands, before taking a deep breath and admitting, "I've been depressed too, y'know. Sometimes it's hard for me to get out of bed...but...y'know...you've made me feel a lot happier, even on the bad days," she admitted, "Medicine and therapists can get me out of bed, and out the door, but...you make me smile."

Lars blushed from embarrassment, alcohol, and something else. Something he'd felt when with Sadie on the island.

Sadie sighed, "Maybe what happened on the island wasn't the best thing. I...I really do like you, but I don't think it's going to work with where we are now. Maybe...if we just stay as friends, and...try to figure stuff out, we can think about it, OK?"

Lars looked at her like he'd been crushed, "But you're going to college, and you're going to get a beefcake boyfriend, and I'll miss you, an-"

He was cut off by Sadie putting her hand over his slurring mouth, "Lars, I'm going to community college. Other side of town. I'll still work some shifts with you. Besides... Who else can I tutor for chemistry?", she teased weakly.

He gave a weak smile, and flopped back, "...I...still don't feel better...", he admitted, showing weakness.

"...I know...", she sighed, "Maybe you can talk to the school counselor or go see a therapist or something...or maybe something else. Maybe it might not even be me who knows what's best," she mumbled. Maybe it was more about what she needed to do to help than what she wanted to do.

Before she could add anything, Lars sat up, staring at her with a small, but genuine smile, and slightly leaned in. Sadie did the same, and soon, they both closed the space between them with a quick, chaste kiss. Nothing could come of it, but it was a sign things could get better for both of them. Together and individually.

"You're not a loser, Lars."

"You're not a loser, Sades."

And Lars promptly threw up in a bucket while she held his hair back.


End file.
